Tough Sh*t - Kevin Smith book

Tough Sh*t: Life Advice from a Fat, Lazy Slob Who Did Good

by Kevin Smith

Kevin Smith is a movie director.  He has mostly made small independent films that are aimed to slackers and potheads.  His bigger movies you may have never heard of are Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back and his one attempt at a big budget movie Cop Out (which flopped big time) .  The funny part of this review is I have seen none of the above movies.  They are just not my cup of film stock. Not aimed toward my age group.  Kevin Smith himself is an admitted foul mouthed fat slob who clearly has no filter on his mouth.  Anyone that knows me would clearly say Royce is going to hate this guy!  Yet like a moth to a flame there is something about the guy.  I have seen him on many talk shows and he is very funny.  He is a clever writer and speaks well.  He even filled in on At the Movies as a reviewer when Roger Ebert first got sick.

As I said Kevin Smith is very foul mouthed.  In this book if he were dropping H-bombs instead of F-bombs the planet would now be gone.  He is very inappropriate. He drives 100 miles past TMI when he talks of his sex life with his beautiful wife. Maybe 200 miles.  If my kids ever read any of my blogs right about here would be saying Dad is going to hate this guy.  Sadly he is like watching a train wreck.  You just can't look away.

This book is a slight attempt at an autobiography for Smith.  He more rambles about his childhood and touches about interesting parts of his life so far.  Kevin is (you may remember) the fat guy that Southwest Airlines probably inappropriately tossed him off a crowded plane after everyone was seated because he was too large.  Southwest probably should have looked at his Twitter account and saw he had 1.5 million followers before they gave him the heave ho.  He devotes a whole very funny, kinda sad chapter to this episode.

I would say the cost of the book is well spent just on the chapter on Bruce Willis.  So often we hear whispers about pampered spoiled movie stars.  It's generally only whispers as actors/directors/reviewers because that person is a big star and they may need to work with them in the future.  Safe to say Kevin Smith is not worried about ever working with Bruce Willis ever again.  Kevin has a small acting part in the last Die Hard movie and had a chance to meet him.  He was a big fan of all of Bruce's movies and looked at him with stars in his eyes.  When Smith was picked to direct his first movie with a budget, Cop Out he could not have been more thrilled when he heard Bruce Willis had agreed to be in the movie.  Smith and most of the others took a huge pay cut to afford Willis.  Needless to say it did not go well.  I believe if you bought this book (or listened to the audio version as I do)  read the Willis chapter and threw it away you would feel you spent your money well.

I can't stress enough this book is not for everyone.  I don't know why I liked it so much.  If I were to give it to someone I'd put it in a brown paper bag and slide it to them under the table.  Yet I laughed my butt off.  I found myself walking the dog alot to get a chance to listen to the book.  Afterwards I feel I have watched a train wreck. : >

The Hunger Games

The Hunger Games

Rating 8.5 out of 10


As I'm sure anyone reading this knows this movie is based on the first of a trilogy of books by Susanne Collins.  I read the first two books and enjoyed them.  Once I knew there were movies being made I decided to wait and read the third book just before the movie comes out.  I know there are millions that have read the books and I will say you will not be disappointed.

In the movie we see North America in the future.  We find it is being run by the evil Capitol goons that live in the lavish city surrounded by twelve districts who live in literal starvation while providing goods for the fat cats.  In punishment for a squashed revolution many years before the Capitol created a yearly battle where one boy and girl from each district (age between 12-18) are chosen at random to fight to the death with one winner.  The winners district gains extra food and goods for the upcoming year.

Our hero is Katniss Evergreen played perfectly by Jennifer Lawrence.  She is tough as nails and has honed her hunting skills slipping into the forbidden land killing food to feed her mom and sister. When her younger sister is selected Katniss steps up to go in her place.  Most of the cast is how I pictured from the book.

If you have not read the book I feel you will enjoy the movie as much as those who have.  If you are worried it will be a blood and guts movie with sixth graders killing each other it is not.  The fighting is done tastefully.  Probably more in the movie than the book since they had to have that PG-13 rating.  This is a good movie for all.  For the very young (under 12) I'd leave it to the parent to decide.  There are some scary parts with rabid dogs and killer bees.

I only have one gripe with the movie.  When I bought my first video camera I thought it was very cool to zoom in and out rapidly and was not the best at holding the camera still.  When we watched the movies later it was clear someone should have held off on the caffeine before filming.  The director (Gary Ross) took the same approach with much of this movie.  I wanted to yell at the screen to hold the camera still!

I overcame my hostile feelings to really like this movie.  It was 2.5 hours in length but flew by for me.  I highly recommend it for everyone.

The Butterfly Circus- short film

Someone sent me a link to this short movie several months ago.  I love movies, but I'm generally not into little short films.  The few I have seen were mostly boring art house type films poorly made on a shoestring budget with bad acting.  I gave the Butterfly Circus a try and was very glad I did.   A different friend forwarded me this link again today and it made me smile.

I almost hate to describe it as I doubt I can do it justice.

Back in the Depression there was a little man with nearly no arms or legs.  The only way he can make a living is being a sideshow freak.  People laugh and throw things at him.  He naturally becomes very bitter.    One day a man comes through the sideshow that does not make fun of him.  He is the ringleader of the Butterfly Circus and welcomes him to the group.  He learns for the first time what it's like to be treated by people who are good and loving.

The short 22 minute film is well made and acted.  It will leave you with that warm and fuzzy feeling we all need from time to time.  Trust me on this and give it a try.

Watch it here in the full screen.

The Butterfly Circus

John Carter

John Carter

Rating 6 out of 10

It seems like Disney has been playing commercials for this movie for a year.  I had high hopes for this one.  A fantasy mixed with lots of action.  The movie delivers on the action (especially if you haven't seen the previews over and over.  The story is several times more complicated than it needs to be.  The story of John Carter comes from a classic novel starting back a hundred years ago.

John Carter is an ex captain in the civil war looking for gold when he stumbles upon a port that zips him to a desert on Mars.  Turns out Mars is not full of little green men.  Half the inhabitants are cool tall green people with four arms and horns off their face.  The other half for some reason look like humans.  The human Martians have been in a civil war for many years.  John because of the difference  in the gravity is able to leap tall buildings (or big rocks) in a single bound.  Both sides want John to fight with them.  He knows which side is the good side because the princess is really hot.  There is something about a third group that wants to take over the whole planet, but it got too deep for me.

Taylor Kitsch plays our hero John Carter.  He is mostly famous from the tv show Friday Night Lights that I never watched and one of the X-men films.  He does a good job here.  The hot princess is played by the lovely Lynn Collins who was also in that last X-men movie.  The acting on the whole is very good.  Its the story that needs a little work.

This is a good-enough action movie that if you want to see it I'd recommend an early showing.  I saw the non- 3D version cuz I don't like 3D.  Didn't feel like I missed anything.  Leaving the theater I did wish I had four arms like the cool green guys!