Ted 2

Ted 2

I have to admit I was not a fan of Ted 1.  I did not see it in the theaters.  Had no desire to.  My oldest son gave me his dvd to watch even though he was pretty sure I wouldn't like it.  He was correct.  I didn't care for it one bit.  Nothing funny to me with a cute teddy bear that drops F-bombs and smoked dope all day.  I am in Cincinnati watching it rain out my son's baseball game and went to Ted 2 because everyone else wanted to see it and there was nothing else on.

While I'd say for me Ted 2 is far from a good movie but it did have some very funny laugh out loud parts and it was better than Ted 1.

Ted 2 starts several years after Ted 1 with Ted marrying a way too hot female.  A year later Ted and wife are fighting like crazy.  Ted and his best buddy John (Mark Wahlberg) decide the best way to save the marriage is to have a child.  The problem is Ted is a teddy bear and has no male private parts.  In trying to adopt a baby it puts Ted on the governments radar who determines he is not human and now has no rights at all.  They are fighting it in court and lucky for them the pretty blonde lawyer (Amanda Seyfried) gets severe headaches and smokes a bong load of pot every evening.

Seriously if you go to this movie it's not to see a plot.  While still plenty of cussing and drug humor it is toned down a bit from the last one.  As I said there were some laugh out loud moments.  I was mildly entertained.  If you loved the first one you will undoubtedly love this one too.

Jurassic World

Jurassic World

Rating 7 out of 10

I have to admit I LOVED Jurassic Park.  I think I gave it one of my very few 10's back in 1993.  So the bar was set very high for this movie.  It comes close to the bar but in my opinion does not reach it.

With Jurassic World we fast forward 23 years from when the original Park went haywire and people were eaten.  They now feel they have it under control and it's been a type of Disney World with teeth for many years.  People flock to Costa Rica to see dinosaurs up close.  Little kids ride them like ponies.  People kayak along creeks with them.  Huge whale sized shark fish do tricks like Sea World. Already people are getting bored with dinosaurs.  The corporate types are feeling the need to up the ante every couple years to keep attendance up.  As you have seen in the hundreds of commercials to get people in the park they decide to create the biggest, coolest, meanest dinosaur ever.  Amazingly enough that doesn't go well.  People get eaten.

Million$ are spent on the dinosaurs.  No much was spent on the paint by numbers storyline.  I know, what am I thinking?  A complicated plot on a dinosaur movie?  They had a check list.  Need a heartless corporate type that only cares about the bottom line.  Check (Bryce Dallac Howard).  Hunky ultra-maintaince man type that cares for the toothy dinosaurs like they were his kids. Check (Chris Pratt). Evil military guy that only wants to get his hands on the dinosaurs to use at weapons even tho it makes no sense. Check (Vincent D'Onofrio).  Floppy haired kid that needs a hair cut and gets on Royce's nerves.  Check.

This movie moves well and there are some cool dinosaurs.  My movie buddy Ted would say I'm being way too hard on it.  I probably am.  I was hoping for another 10 and got a 7.  Was surprised the special effects was not really any better than 23 years ago.  Shows how incredible the original was.

Still well worth seeing.  I was entertained.

Spy

Spy

Rating 6 out of 10

I broke my own rule about comedies.  I knew better.  It's just not a good idea to go to a funny movie at the early show with a mostly empty theater.  The jokes are just funnier with a theater full of people laughing instead of the one lady two rows behind me that laughs like a goof ball at EVERY joke! I saw this on a rain day in Mobile, Alabama with six other people in the theater.

Not a huge plot here.  A really bad woman ,Raina Boyanov, (Rose Byrne) has a nuke she is selling to the highest bidder with plans of them setting it off in NYC.  Somehow she has a list of all current CIA agents and can spot them a mile away.  Susan Cooper (Melissa McCarthy)  is a long time CIA agent that works in the office running the computer and talking to other agents in the field.  When they need someone to locate Raina, Susan feels she is the woman for the job since no one knows who she is.

Of course Cooper is bumbling and does everything wrong.  Jason Statham plays agent Rick Ford who is afraid of no one and wants to take the woman down against the wishes of the bosses.  Statham is actually pretty funny.  I like Melissa McCarthy.  I was a big fan of her tv show Mike and Molly for the first couple years.  While watching this movie I had to think another actress would have been better suited.  Not sure who I'd pick, but someone like a stockier Tina Fey would be great.

I laughed.  Had I seen this in a Friday night full theater I probably would have laughed more.  I used to like Rose Byrne.  Now I wish she'd eat a cheeseburger.  She is so skeleton skinny she is not even pretty anymore.

I was entertained.  If the trailer looks good to you then I"d say you won't regret spending your money.